(That's what my friends just call me)
Well I been gone but I'm back again
It's been too long ya wonder where I been
Well I bet yall thought I would pack it in
Since I got dissed on MTV for Dear Slim
Awww man...why'd yall play me
TRL you drive me crazy
Now everybody really hates me
I thought we were friends Carson Daly
So then I tried out for American Idol
I got up and sang for Simon Cowell
But he said I was "Absolutely horrible"
Said I was worse than William Hung too
What do I do please help me could ya?
I keep getting punked like Ashton Kutcher
Since my name is still bashed and butchered
I'm a just change it so listen would ya?
Yeah I don't know if I'm past my prime
I'm feeling old I just turned twenty-nine
It's crazy I think I've lost my mind
Cause lately at shows I forget my...uhh...
Sometimes I feel like my brain is missing
Sometimes I feel like Jessica Simpson
Don't know if tuna is fish or chicken
I told it's Five-Two nobody listens
Ok you don't believe that's true
Even my mom still thinks it's fifty-two
Now I tried to explain but it's no use
But at least the kids say "Man you're cool"
Now really man I can't complain
Kids take puff paint and write my name
On they t-shirts and they be like "Woooo heyyy!!"
That's why it's time for me to change
I used to come through with my system blasting
People couldn't miss when I tried to pass em
In a Honda Civic with the muffler draggin'
Shoes off hairy feet like Bilbo Baggins
Back when I was living wrong
I needed to get tipsy like J-Kwon
But now a days all I need is God
And a mic and a DJ and my I-Pod
Alright put ya dance shoes on
Everybody just get your groove on
We rock the party to the break of dawn
And even get your grandmom to sing along
Now what I say don't take this lightly
God runs things not Bruce Almighty
He's Jesus the only one I need
Fivetweezy yall know what I mean